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65 Things To Do On An Airplane

1. Fart loudly and act shocked, looking around to see who did it
2. Fiddle around with the emergency exit, then ask a fellow passenger if he has a crowbar
3. Hijack the cockpit and, over the loudspeaker, anounce that the first class passengers and luggage are to switch places
4.-REMOVED-
5. Go into the bathroom and make rude bodily noises, then come out looking refreshed
6. -REMOVED-
7. “Accidental” soda spill on the dork next to you.
8. -REMOVED-
9. Tap at the windows, saying “Looks pretty tough” then ask someone if they have a bat you could use to test.
10. Disco dance in the aisle
11. Mess up your hair, untuck your shirt, basically look crude, and mingle with a first class guy as if you were long-lost friends
12. -REMOVED-
13. Go into the bathroom, drop your pants, then come out, yelling “We’re out of toilet paper! Stewardess!”
14. -REMOVED-
15. Try to lead plane in song “Oh I wish I was an Oscar Myer Weiner”
16. Lead a revolt against the first class passengers
17. Attempt to promote Hinduism amongst passengers
18. Moon passing Delta planes
19. Lead a bible study session in the back of the plane
20. Start a hot dog stand
21. Steal businessman’s laptop, play solitaire on it
22. -REMOVED-
23. During the in-flight movie, ask to share headphones with someone
24. When two people kiss in the film, belch real loud
25.-REMOVED-
26. Tell the person next to you your life story, from fetus to that afternoon
27. With the person next to you, discuss cannibalism among airline crash passengers on deserted islands
28. Remark that perhaps you shouldn’t have put superglue in your undies that morning
29. Pick your nose and pat the person next to you
30. No matter what the meal choices are, demand rice-a-roni
31. Show off your Batman underwear
32. Ask the guy next to you to hold your dentures (senior citizens only)
33. Switch accents and see if anyone notices
34. During the meal, loudly explain that one time you ate shark fin soup
and proceeded to puke all over the airplane, spewing chunks of shark on the other passengers
35. Sneak into the cockpit and hit the warning alarm
36. Explain how, one time, the plane was crashing and the oxygen masks didn’t come out, ’cause they aren’t really reliable, and that if the plane was to crash, everyone would die
37. Put on a ten foot diameter sombrero and slouch in your seat, whacking everyone on the head
38. Scratch your butt, then sniff your finger
39. Go into the cockpit, flick on the intercom light, then loudly inquire as to why the fuel dial says “e”
40. -REMOVED-
41. Don’t use deodorant, then “accidentally” stick your armpit in someones face
42. Sneeze, using somebodies sleeve instead of your hand to cover it
43. Listen to James Brown on your Walkman, sing along (especially the
“Oooh Oooh” parts)
44. Snort when you laugh
45. Tell corny jokes and laugh like it’s absolutely hilarious, then expect others to do the same 46. Wear a hairpiece and switch it often, seeing if anyone notices
47. Sing that irritaing song that starts like this “I lost my car on the rooooooaaddd an’ I’m cryin’ over yooooouuuu….”
48. Recite all you can of the last Ann Landers column
49. Hum the Monty Python theme song
50. Act like a movie star
51. Scream and dive under your seat for no apparent reason
52. Ride carry-on luggage down the aisle, yelling “Yeee-ha!”
53. With a desperate look, ask the stewardess where the bathroom is, then look relieved and say “Nevermind. Do you have any towels?”
54. Whip out your kazoo and give first class a special entertainment show
55. Jump up and scream “AAAHHH!! I left the stove on!!”
56. Bring a microphone and act like Frank Sinatra
57. Ask someone for their autograph, pretending that you think they’re Kevin Costner or Goldie Hawn (This best when the person looks nothing like the movie star in question)
58. Start talking Korean
59. If someone has a bad toupee, whack it off
60. Pretend you’re flying the plane
61. With a fellow passenger, Re-enact the disco scene in “Airplane!”
62. Get some rub-on tattoos and a leather jacket, pretend that you belong
to a biker gang
63. Take over the plane with a toy gun
64. Yell to someone “Is it time to hijack the plane yet?” (Note: Do this when there are stewardesses there)
65. To the person next to you, say “It’s amazing that they didn’t notice the grenade in my luggage

Back to Things To Do

Please Comment…

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14 Responses

  1. I have a few to add…

    1. Keep calling hostesses for service and then forgetting what you want.
    2. Put on a comedy show infront of everyone and demand a free flight.
    3. Buy the plane out of Duty Free.
    4. Sneak into First class and hide under someones seat.
    5. Make loud whiffy farts and then say that it wasn’t you.

  2. I have some.

    Pretend you have a cold. Blow your nose on your sleeve/shirt, Make snot drip out

    Whenever the person/people behind you seat arent looking, peek from your seat and watch them and snicker and say Teeheeheehee.

    Eat on the plane. Make gross noises. Get it on your mouth. “Pretend” your face fell in the food. Make sure some is in your nose. Blow your nose on your shirt/partners shirt.

  3. your site is the coolest

  4. lol this site is ….well….what is it mainly about? random things?
    Pablo: “The Panic Button contains Funny pictures, videos, And Everything Worth Laughing about on the internet!” That’s a quote taken from the left sidebar under the arrow saying “about”

  5. Why do people leave discusting things to do on an airplane? but i have one(ITS NOT DISCUSTING).

    1) If your airplane flight is long and you wanna sleep, sleep in the aisle and when the stewardess comes pretend shes not there

  6. SOOOO funny!!

  7. ROFL!! I’ve got some!

    1. Randomly start doing CPR on the person sitting next to you.

    2. Bring an ice cream on the plane and wait till it starts melting. Then ask the person sitting next to you to hold it while you ‘get something out of your bag’. Take ages and eventually ‘find’ the thing you want when the ice cream has melted all over them!!

    3. Start flicking stuff at the hostesses and ignore them when they tell you to stop.

    4. Hit the person next to you, then say “Bob did it.”

    5. When a really exciting part in the movie comes on (one you’ve already seen), shout “BORING!! I’ve seen this one before…” Then say what happens.

    6. Start singing ‘Witch Doctor’ really loud when the movie starts.

    7. Go into the bathroom and stuff all the toilet paper down the toilet.

    -Skatagirl96 😀 😀 😀

  8. 58 is easy! i really can talk korean… lol

  9. omg i love this website! it is the best! i come on here every day after school and i am instantly not depressed from being in school any more! sorry i dont have any to add i wish i did!

  10. hahaha ive done number 50!!! 2 weeks ago i was in washington DC with my school and i was acting like hannah montanna around random people and talkuing to tem in my hannah montana voise 😆

  11. most of these (like pulling the warning switch) should be taken off because you could get in serious trouble or seriously(not the funny way either) scare people

    Sam: I’ve been to the edge!

  12. ROFL these are awesome xD

  13. poop in dha sink

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